Days 54- 58

Keep Your Head Up

"You only ever grow as a human being if you're outside your comfort zone."
- Percy Cerutty

Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore. 
- Andre Gide

~ Both of these quotes were inspired by the work we do on COTS. It's when we are out of our comfort zone that we are able to grow and see the greatness God has for us and how He pushes us through and through. Once we lose sight of the shore we are able to discover more shores that will be worth it in the long haul. Sure you may confront many storms, but with the help of God, He can help you navigate the way to a brand new world. COTS has and is showing us this by letting go of the control we want to have and giving it all to Him. Letting Him steer our wheel not only takes stress off of us but guides us to new paths that create opportunities to help other people going through similar problems that we are going through. So let go and let God. :)

     As each day passes I realize more and more how God works in everyone's lives. Whether many of them are "Christians" or not, being able to see the smallest miracle work through and around people really helps keep my head up. Though sometimes, as I've said several times, it's hard to keep a positive attitude, having faith that God will work in our lives helps keep me moving. Throughout this week I mainly talked to Jimmy. We got really close and Andrew and I were able to get him his ID. The process however was far from simple. That Friday we arrived at St. Paul and Gary handed us the letter that the elders had written for Jimmy, letting him use their mailing address for his ID. We headed over to the DMV and while we waited for Jimmy's number to be called out I prayed and prayed that everything would work out just fine. Going through so much the day before, like a roller coaster ride of emotions, I don't know what I would've felt like if they wouldn't let Jimmy get his ID. Then his number was called out. It was like it was too good to be true.. the lady was actually nice and asked Jimmy to sign in a few places and to stare at the camera until it flashes. I seriously didn't think this was going to happen until the camera actually flashed and that flash was also my sign that Jimmy had actually received his ID. When he got it he was BEYOND happy and we took him to Dairy Queen and returned to St. Paul's where he showed his ID to a few of the guys there. 

     I saw him again the next day for Saturday on the Street and I could still see the joy in his eyes. He helped Lauren make snow cones and always asked me if I wanted anything- until he actually gave me some water :) Jimmy has become an extremely close friend to me. I care about him so much and I'm excited that he has become a part of my life and that hopefully I've become a part of his. This is exactly what Church on the Street is; to be able to create strong friendships and stay in touch with each other throughout time- and that's what I hope will happen to Jimmy and I's friendship. I also have become close to Manny (The Hawaiian as I like to call him haha ), Joshua, Tony, Reggie, and Moe. Each of theses guys have opened my eyes incredibly and touched my heart. They also encouraged me whenever I was down and always knew how to bring me up. We now have a few inside jokes that we use on a regular basis :)

     I also ask that you keep a woman named Jennifer in your prayers. We had been praying for her to show up to Retreat since she had been gone for a few weeks. She showed up on Friday and at first she was doing ok but one thing led to another that made her tell me that she's not going to Retreat anymore. She struggles with a few things in her life and I just pray that God can help her through all this and lead her to people that will care for her. Hopefully she'll come back in a  few weeks. Other than that we have 2 more mission teams coming in tomorrow- so keep Church on the Street in your prayers as well as the mission teams! I'm excited to see what will happen within the next week! 

Jenny Sample

Day 50 - 53

People need to be loved and valued by others. They need to see what love looks like.

When we allow ourselves to be disarmed, we become both vulnerable and strong.  

 Difficult choices humble us and force us to rely on God’s grace and to see God’s wisdom.

      Internship is going so awesome right now. But I'll be honest.. sometimes I  feel like I'm worn out and have nothing to give. I wake up every morning and pray for strength. On Wednesday (June 6) I really felt like going back to the office after Retreat. Luckily I went on a parish walk with Hana and Andrew where we went to St. Luke's park. Jimmy, Moe, and Daniel were there. I always love talking to those guys so Andrew and I went over. We began talking with Jimmy and he told us how he's trying to get his ID and birth certificate. We told him we would help him and drive him over and to see Jimmy's face.. that was awesome. He couldn't really describe how happy he was just that he is ready to make a change. So today we did just that. We took Jimmy and got his birth certificate. He was so excited!! So after that we went to the DMV for his ID.. but of course we ran into some red tape that in the end have to come back tomorrow. So please please keep us, especially Jimmy in your prayers, so that he can be one step closer to entering a program! Even though I was tired throughout this week, seeing Jimmy and being able to help me out gave me strength. Being able to help out a friend in need... is beyond amazing. Jimmy has helped me value my life and family and to be able to do something in return is the least I can do for a friend. 

     Today I also saw Janice. I haven't seen her in a long time and have been praying for her safety. Today she showed up when Gary was talking to Jimmy and I. She said she found a place to stay but she wanted to find a Women's Christian Center so I told her I'd find one. Gary got a few numbers and I called Odyssey III to find out that they have openings. So please pray for Janice. She is one of the sweetest women I've met who really wants to get out of the streets. She is one friend who is close to my heart and I want what's best for her and what God wants for her and I pray that little by little God reveals Himself to her. 

     Throughout this week we also went on parish walks, especially to Retreat. On the Fourth we walked around and talked to a few people and took 2 of our friends out for lunch. Apparently the police are enforcing the rule of not feeding the homeless. So many of them are struggling. 

     But I know that we just have to be patient and do what we can. Like the 3rd quote says, we must rely on God through our difficult parts in our lives. I pray that throughout these difficult times that many of our friends are going through, that they rely on God and that we can comfort them and show them God's love. Please keep us in your prayers because they help more than you can imagine!

Jenny Sample

Day 45- Day 48

Everyone has a story

    I've always said that everyone has a story. Whenever talking to anyone, to always treat them justly because you never know what they're going through. It isn't until this summer that throughout my internship I am able to understand (and still learn more) about this phrase. Throughout this week I was able to talk to Jimmy, Daumal, Daniel, Tommy, Hawk, Price, and several other guys. Each of these guys had their own story. With each of them I was also able to tell them parts of my story and be able to connect with them through that. With Jimmy in particular, I was able to see someone through his eyes. Every word of that conversation I had with him was like that someone was talking to me. It really helped open my eyes to see his point of view from the situation and slowly start to restore certain things that I myself have struggled with. 

     Going out to the streets day after day also helps see the reality of the world. While I say this time and time again, coming from Georgia Tech, I was completely oblivious to half of the things going around in my own community. Being an intern for Church on the Street helps create newfound relationships that have helped me grow stronger in my faith and in myself as well. Talking so several of the guys from the streets gives me perspective of my struggles compared to everyone's struggles. One thing that has been hard for me, and still is, is being away from my friends and family. Even though I have made several new friends here and I love it, I miss everyone back at school and home. Going to Devo Dinner was very strange to me because I wasn't used to that surrounding anymore. I felt kinda weird! I struggled going back to my COTS surrounding because I realized just how much I love my friends at Tech. The same goes with my family. Every Sunday they visit me and every Sunday they leave me. I love it but I hate it everytime. Texting my sister and mom makes my day a little better but also makes me think about how much I love them. I love my family back in Mexico as well. Knowing that my mom is going to Mexico to see them for a week makes me extremely happy because I know she needs to see them but it also makes me sad because I want to see them too. 

     See, my grandfather passed away a few months ago and the last time I saw my family was for his funeral. It's been pretty hard sometimes but my family and I have been able to overcome the sadness and be happy that he is in a better place. However, that's not to say that there hasn't been any struggles. I would have loved to go and see my family in Mexico and yeah it made me sad I can't go but I know that God put me here for a reason. I know that God is slowly guiding me to the path that He wants me to be in. But it has been rough every now and then. 

     Crazy how God works though... just as I was getting real low I read this quote from "With Justice for All":

God will use your suffering to “perfect, confirm, strengthen, and establish you”

     I absolutely loved this quote because I was going through some suffering and it was God's way of saying "I'm making you stronger". Through all this time away I've had from my family, God is making me stronger. Through the times I'm away from my friends, God is making me stronger. But it also is the same for everyone I've talked to, everyone who's reading this, everyone in general. For Jimmy, God is making him stronger through the tempations he faces and the decisions he makes. For Daumal, God is making him stronger for the patience  the commitment he has for his friends. I just pray that God can keep us focused on the important things He has for us and to help us realize that through life and its suffering- it is there that He strengthens us the most. Ahhh I need to remember this everyday. Please keep me in yours prayers and everyone else too!

Jenny Sample

June 28, 2011 - Day 44

     Today was a parish walk! WOOHOO. This was the first time the three girls went on one solo. You would've been proud Pastor Andy :) We went to Central Park where we saw our friend Carey and he talked to us more than "Do you have socks?" He also asked us what time it was and if we had underwear. I believe that is a step up. After we went to Renaissance where we met someone new! His name was Tony and we talked about where we were from. He seemed pretty chill but it was clear that he was waiting for someone so we just kept walking towards Peachtree and Pine. Once we got there we talked to Robert for awhile. I remember when he would barely talk to us. Now he told us how he went to the hospital for some artificial tears because he got dry eyes. He also had a huge smile on his face and told us that he knows why God put him out on the streets because he needed time to figure his life out and he is doing just that. He also keeps in regular contact with his sister, so please keep Robert in your prayers!

     After talking to Robert, I talked to Sherry. I've never seen her until sometime last week so I wanted to get to know her better. She said she was born in N.C. but arrived in Atlanta and she's waiting on getting her I.D. from the Shelter. She seemed pretty quiet but I enjoyed talking to him. Our other friend, Robert, then came up and he talked to us for a bit. After a while we went to the top of the hill where we met up with Mike, Will, Tonette (Hell Raiser), and a few of our other friends. Tonette actually gave Lauren and I a piece of Church's chicken.. I was so incredibly amazed.. She then took care of us by throwing all our trash. Then she was wanting a ring so I gave her my spoon ring that Six made me (sad day I know).. but she LOVED it. She said she was gonna keep it on for the rest of her life so let's see if she has it next time I stop around. She gave me hug too. That was nice. Josh then came after that!

     We just chilled the rest of the time. I taught him some spanish and he drew in my little notebook. He seemed kind of out of it for a while... Hana and Lauren then decided to leave so we did and Josh decided to join us. We walked to the office and once there I sat down with Josh and tried telling him of what his dad told me... but once again he said that he doesn't have any condition and he refuses to take medication. He said that he doesn't have anything wrong with him but at the same time he said he is confused on what he has. He contradicted himself a lot throughout our conversation and it ended kind of.. well blah is the only word I can come up with. I told him that we were going to Retreat because he went today in the morning for breakfast) and he should come but he said God doesn't want him there. I just ask that you keep Josh in your prayers. I told him how his parents want to help him and so do I but that he needs to want to help himself. I also told him that I'd be there for him as a friend. He smiled at that. So I just hope that our relationship can keep helping him and that God really enters in his life.

That is all.

Jenny Sample

June 27, 2011 - Day 43

     Today we went to Retreat around 2 after stopping by Starbucks to get the pastries. We walked in and I saw everyone and went to the back to talk to Mike and Six. Lauren and I were there and they were telling us how they want to make a small business for the spoon rings that Six makes. I thought that was a pretty cool idea! Mike was really excited and told us the different processes that they would have to go through to actually be able to make it a business- so please keep them in your prayers! 

     Then Gary began wrapping everything up so little by little everyone was walking out the door. However, Julius and another fellow were getting in an argument and it was escalating fast. For one of the first times it really bothered me- that Julius was having an argument not only inside a church but after he was apologizing for what he did wrong, even though we was still continuing the fight. I tried calming them down and the guy left but Julius was still a bit upset. I don't know.. but that just really bothered me. I need patience in that section I guess... 

     After that bit of drama we all began sorting through and organizing the clothing closet. That was pretty fun because Lauren, Hana, Gary, Tony, and I got into some silly clothing pieces a took a picture (go to the bottom of the page to see it!). The day ended in going to CCF for Devo Dinner where I got to see a lot of my friends who I haven't seen in over a month! It was a kind of weird experience because I wasn't used to the Tech atmosphere but I loved seeing my friends. Talking to them and sharing stories was pretty awesome and it makes me realize just how lucky I am to be in a school with people that care about me. Makes me miss Tech and classes- crazy I know! But then I came back to my job and realized how much I love that. It might be hard at times (a lot of times sometimes! haha) but in the end it's worth it. To be able to see how God works in small and large scales is simply awesome. I pray that God can continue to work in the hearts of the interns and create strength in us to be positive when we encounter negative situations- to know that God works in everyone's lives, but through God's timing. Ah that seems so hard to keep in my mind... but I must continue praying for that. And please keep us in your prayers!

Jenny Sample

June 25, 2011 - Day 41

     So remember how I totally stopped talking to Josh and I was reunited with him yesterday? Well today just got better. Yesterday we never really had a chance to talk a lot but today he came to Saturday on the Street. I was plain amazed to see him there! I always told him to stop by but he never did and now he was here! I made him a snow cone (or 3) and he played chess with some of the girls from the mission team. I then played him and won and later won against 2 more other people woohoo! After that, Lauren was going back to St. Paul's with some of the guys to pack up and Hana and I were gonna take the team to the CNN center for the homeless walk. Josh asked me what I was doing and I told him and asked him to join us so he did. We got there and I bought him lunch. At the CNN Center he talked about the usual different things and how Siddhartha is related to ET and to God. Throughout this entire time I just assumed that it was the drugs that messed up with his thinking.. but there was more to come.
     After lunch Hana talked to the group about the walk and we drove back to the office and Josh joined us. I wanted to get to know him better and so I asked him to tell me about himself. He said that he didn't wanna be who he was in the past and as we were talking he wanted to use the phone to call his dad so I let him. He talked to him for a while and once he was done I actually talked to him. His name is Chuck and he told me how Josh was diagnosed with being bipolar and having schizophrenia. His mom and himself tried helping Josh by sending him to the doctor and getting him to take medication but Josh won't admit that he has a problem. His dad also told me that he wants to send him money but he knows Josh will lose it. Laso that Josh forgets many things (like going and getting his social security) and that he needs someone to be there for him. His dad told me how Josh does know God because he went to a Christian school and his dad has been praying for someone to help him out. I knew that at this moment was the moment God wanted me to be in. Throughout the past month that I heard nothing of Josh I constantly asked the guys from the street where/how he was doing. That the only time I knew of him. Seeing him yesterday and spending the entire day with him was such a blessing. Talking to his dad was even more of a blessing. To see that his family actually cares about- man, the blessings just keep piling up.
     Josh told me that his mom hated him and didn't wanna have anything to do with him. But his mom does care about him- which is why she took him to the hospital so he could get back on his meds. When I finished talking to his dad I told him that he can call my phone whenever he wants and I also gave him my email. I pray that we stay in touch. Hana, Lauren, and I then started walking to Woodruff. Josh came with us and I tried telling him was his dad had told me. I also tried telling him about his mental disorder but he didn't want to believe me. In fact, he strongly denied me and said that the doctors weren't good and weren't trying to help him. But he said that he trusted me and that he was happy that he could call me my friend. I told him that I was happy that I could call him my friend and that I cared about him a lot. We got to Woodruff and we continued talking there and I told him that as a friend I would tell him what I thought and he could do the same. We later then went to Underground where we sat somewhere because I was SO tired. There, I gave him my number and wrote down that I will always be his friend and that "everything's good in the end. If it's not good then it's not the end." He then began writing. He wrote down "I am failure. Worm. Fall." and several other sad/negative words. He said that's who he was. Nobody. That he was lost and he couldn't find God. His mind was so lost and confused and I really didn't know what to do. I could only pray for him. By that time 6 hit and he had to get back to the Shelter. I walked him out and told him that no matter what happens I would always be here as a friend. He said that he loves me and to take care and be safe and he gave me a hug. I really care for this guy. He is such a sweetheart and I want to be there for him. But I know that God needs to take control of his life and that Josh needs to want to change (I told him that!). It's just so hard when you care a lot for someone. So please keep Josh in your prayers :)
     On the way back from Underground a group of the girls from the team and I met Tina. She said she was abducted and talked about it for 40ish minutes. It was crazy to hear her stories that I don't even know if they're true or not. I hope to talk to her again and really be able to understand what she said! We then went back to the office and debriefed there. I really liked having the mission team here and felt that they got a lot out of it, especially this last walk back from the park. I hope that they got something out of it. Most of the day I spent talking to Josh and I told them how he just happens to be special in my heart and I knew they understood what I meant. This was such a wonderful day and I really pray that God continues to work in my life and everyone else.
Jenny Sample

June 24, 2011 - Day 40

     MISSION TEAM IS HERE. Not gonna lie, I was really really nervous. Andy left yesterday for a speaking convention and the guy interns left as well to help out. So it is just us girls + Gary to handle the team. I really wasn't feeling the greatest today and I just wanted to sleep but I prayed to God that he could give me strength for the mission team coming and he did :) We met the team at 4:00 and after the "orientation" we walked them around the Parish... and something CRAZY happened... I SAW JOSH!!!! We were at the Lot talking to Rodney and out of nowhere... Josh comes!!! I got to introduce him to some of the team and we drew and talked for awhile! We went to the top of the Lot and Josh came with us and gosh it was so awesome! He told us how he went to the hospital because his mom sent him there to see if he could come home but later how she didn't want him home (is what Josh told me). I don't know exactly what all went down but he still thinks his mom hates him. He barely spoke with his dad and he still feels like he has nowhere to go. I just pray that I can keep talking to him and understand him better. I seriously never thought I wasn't going to see him again but I was pretty darn happy that I was able to! I told him about SOTS tomorrow so we will see if he comes. I'll definitely keep y'all updated ;)
Jenny Sample